1. |
Is Survived By
02:58
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Keep me alive, in your memory immortalised
Don’t let me die, don’t let me die without a legacy
I said the end was near, you said the end is right fucking here
This is the end
Hands turn to ash when they reach for the past
Start begging time to stop going so fast
Take out my heart, and break it in two
A piece for me, a piece for you
Yours can be bigger I don’t mind
As long as it keeps me on your mind
Keep me on your mind, keep me on your mind
Is survived by, is survived by
I was a friendly face in a foreign room
You clung to me, I clung to you
On my way to see you one last time
I drive by an accident a few turns short from your road
Do you think they got to know
That today was their last day
Or do you never really get to say all of your goodbyes
All of your goodbyes
Do you never really get to say all of your goodbyes
Is survived by is survived by
Will you still say my name even after I die
Is survived by
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2. |
Fade Away
02:49
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Day after day, I can see the walls come crashing down
Everything that I had in place that made me feel safe starts to fade away
Fade away with me
Hand in hand towards eternity
Just another fantasy of mine
As I try to hold back time
Fade away
‘Cause I can’t stay in one place
I’m just trying to escape
Will there always be who I am and who I want to be
Head full of photographs
Always looking to the past
Will any amount ever be enough
Enough for the people I love
Living life through open windows and your missed phone calls
In too deep with nowhere to go, trying to find my home
And when it’s time to say goodbye
I won’t look you in the eye
Nothing stays the same
Time doesn’t give, it only takes away
What should I do when the fire dies
And there's no more light left to find
The day to day shift from happiness to hopelessness
What's the difference
All of my worst moments you carved into my surface
For all to see how could things ever be the same
Head full of photographs
Always looking to the past
Will any amount ever be enough
Enough for the people I love
Living life through open windows and your missed phone calls
In too deep with nowhere to go, trying to find my home
This will be the end of me
This will be the end of me
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3. |
Carve
03:03
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I’m going to hurt you
Hurt you like you hurt me
Don’t move, don’t speak
You’ve worked so hard and now it’s all yours
Now it’s your time to feed
Feed, feed, feed from me
Feed from me
Dig your nails in
Crack my skin made of glass
It’s so kind of you to ask
Before you kill me
Kill me
Before you paint me red for all to see
Before you display my dependency
Just take what you want and leave
Did I not give enough
Was this just another thing I wasn’t capable of
In the wake of every goodbye, every sacrifice
This is all that I ever wanted
And to be honest, it still is
But I don’t have anything left to give
Anything left to give
To give up, to cut off
I am bare, skinless, and raw
Exposed and at such a cost
I am so afraid that I will give everything
That I’ll always be waiting
For something that isn’t coming back
Time has started to escape and everyone is leaving
What have I become
What have I
Carve me into your perfect form
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4. |
My Strength
02:10
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I will stand unmoved
Your voice falls silent before me
I’m not listening i’m not listening
To another mother fucker like you
I can’t hear you
My will remains intact
Reject the infection, pressure to act
No reason to do
Keep my distance stay away from you
This is my decision for myself and no one else
I have nothing to give those that only take
My every confidence established
By a clarity of mind
This life is mine and I have chosen my side
I will not be shaken
By a world of indifference
Something to live by
Something to die by
Something to live by
Something to die by
I know now just as I knew then
That this is my strength
And I am immune to your influence
Today will not be the day
I start giving a fuck what you think
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5. |
Get Out
02:38
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You will take nothing from me
Because you’re not here to stay
Siphoning fucking leech
Nothing
Nothing to say but your own name
We are only as strong as the love that we don’t receive
And make no mistake you are not like me
You are not like me
How predictable
How disappointing
How predictable how predictable
What’s it like to have a face that changes every day
It must be exhausting
It must exhausting to depend on everyone else
To only have what's been given to you
You are not here to stay
Don’t know how to create, only how to make
I wish your intentions weren’t so obvious
Never had my own voice, only others repeated words
So worried about being seen, just part of the fucking herd
All my failures will be my own, I am undeniable
All my failures will be my own, I am undeniable
I am undeniable
I am undeniable
I am undeniable
I am undeniable
Who the fuck are you
Who the fuck are you
Who the fuck are you
Who the fuck are you
My sworn fucking enemy
Disgusting mother fucker
You are poison to everything
Get out, Get out, Get out, Get out, Get out ,Get out
Get out
Get out
Get out
Get out
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6. |
Behind the Bend
02:33
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A reminder from life bitter and bleak
That from now on this is how it has to be
Tell me what you want
What do you want to hear, what do you want to see
Because i’m ready to speak
Do you want to hear me say
That i’m the only one that didn’t see this coming
I miss the feeling of your pulse
I miss the comfort of it all
Something to bring me along
Something to let me know that I wasn’t stuck
Something to let me know
So that I can feel it leave
So i can watch myself fall
As the last few strands of light die behind the bend
I am scared because I know what goes with them
In darkness with no direction
The sky has gone from gray to black and the earth to dust and obsidian
Every second is a year passed
And with it my life is scratched and sapped
I am your creation
I am your creation
Marred and misshapen
Magnificent in my capacity for judgement
I am all the things you cannot unsee
My form is demented and vacant
I am the pale negative
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7. |
Written and Rephrased
03:21
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I now know that there is no escape
No expiration that will be my grace
No release
From what i wake up with every single day
I see your face behind the flames
Fingers pick scabs to blood
No healing no restoration
I’d do anything to keep it away
Anything for a moment of peace
Anything but do what they say
Anything but admit that maybe i’m not okay
Anything but say that I like feeling this way
No more hesitation
Instigated by my own chemistry
No comfort in your company
No need to repeat anymore
Because now i’m listening to every word that you ever said
Waiting for an explanation to how you got in my head
Everything i’ve learned written and rephrased
Progression of nothing it all stays the same
The same the same
I still can’t be left alone
I’m still rotting away
My brain is the hammered stone where you built your home
The home where we both lived for as long as I can remember
They say satisfaction is the death of desire
But no one knows how deep in this mire
I have found myself
And i’m so tired
I’m so tired
Of not being strong
Of not being proud or brave
Cause I don’t know how much more of this I can take
When this has become my everyday
I know love had to leave
But why did I have to stay
Take me
Please take me
Take me
Please take me away
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8. |
I’d Rather Not Say
03:06
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You were my mortality
In your absence what is left to fear
The remedy to my muted mind
To be blind is to see after all this time
Stuck in a stasis
Stagnant
Moments and words compound into days
Days turn to years and here I stayed
I like it here everything has its place
Everything has its place but us
What is there left to feel once you’ve sank into the depths of love
Blessed by the touch of the girl with the gift of Midas
Witness to her grace as she creates and kills all she passes
Fingers fractured by touch
Skin embraced becomes corrupt
Don’t you have anything to say for yourself
Don’t you have anything left to say
Like how I shouldn’t blame myself
Regardless of how many years too late it is for that to help
A single second of clarity
How should I survive my darkest days
Without you to show me the way
Show me the way
Show me
Show me the way
Show me the way
Without direction and in dismay go
I cannot be the one that you need
And this phase of failure is sure to claim
All of the good things that we ever made
And once your voice is gone, you’ll just be a face, you’ll just be a name
I know you only ever wanted what was best for me
And if intentions were actions we wouldn’t speak
And if shame could be measured this would take all day
All for a few words I’d rather not say
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9. |
One Moment From Disaster
03:07
|
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I cannot maintain everyone's expectations of me
I am not your light I am not your guide
Only the product of life unrealised
Don’t ask me for a fucking thing
Cause that’s all I can give consistently
This is not an apology
This is my declaration
A step from calamity
One moment from disaster
I don’t know any better than you
I have simply come to terms with my own unrest
There is no control to be had anymore
This will all go on with or without me
I don’t know what you want
I don’t know what you need
But I know it’s not me, it never will be
You will die and you will fade
And I will continue in the face of your amity abstained
In the company of none I am my own priority
Because I’m the only one that’s not allowed to leave
My intentions are tragic
My existence is an accident
Don’t make a habit out of thinking highly of me
To trust and to love
Is to concede our own human nature
Just because i’m here doesn’t mean that i’m not a failure
Whether or not you realize
We could so easily survive each others loss
Do not allow me to destroy you
Because I will
Living in the fallout of affection’s longing
Just because you love me doesn’t mean that I care
I didn’t mean for this to happen
I move on with complete lack of notion or intent
But that isn’t enough for anyone to give a fuck
No decency is owed
No decency is owed
I am not a person
I am your vessel
Fill me whole fill me whole fill me whole
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10. |
Your Receding Warmth
03:58
|
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The cold is coming as sure as the sun will rise
Your receding warmth is all that I desire
And if you ask I’m not as bad as I seem
But no one ever said that you could trust a single word from me
Lie to myself just to get through the day
What won’t I do to keep what I need
What I need
I’m afraid of the mistakes that i’ve made
I’m afraid that I won’t know ‘till it’s too late
When the damage has already been done
And what will remain of me if this can move on
I want to pull you back but I can’t reach
Our perforated pleasure is finally tearing
Tearing
You’re tearing away from me
The cold is coming as sure as the sun will rise
Your receding warmth is all that I desire
Food has lost its taste
And i’m just losing sleep
Trying to replace the space next to me
Trying to replace
Trying to replace
The space next to me
Trying to replace
Trying to replace
Trying to replace
The space next to me
Trying to replace
Trying to replace you
The cold is coming as sure as the sun will rise
Sure as the sun will rise
Your receding warmth Is all that I desire
All that I desire
Your receding warmth
Your receding warmth
Split my head open look inside
Try to find where it all went wrong
Where it all went wrong
Where I went wrong
Where I went wrong
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11. |
||||
From the departed, dear or otherwise
It’s by you that i’m survived
Because now that i’m gone, I will begin to fade away
And whoever I was to you will start to change
As I go to look for myself in all the shapes that i’ve been perceived
As i give myself to those who would carve me and take without the need
But I will find my strength in whatever should remain
I will bend but not break
And I will push for no sake
No sake other than the need
The need to reject you from me
To get you out, to allow myself a chance to breathe
From the departed, dear or otherwise
It’s darker now, darker than I realised
As I cross over behind the bend
I step past the horizon of who i’ve been
But not all is unfamiliar
Because it’s different here but I am the same
I am met by myself with my thoughts written and rephrased
I have been here before and I will be here again
Alone now reflection starts
No longer can I ignore that behind the bend wasn’t very far
And I spent years just a few steps away from my own heart
And I can almost wish that’s where I had stayed
Because in my heart is where I keep everything that i’d rather not say
But it’s too late
I’m here and so are they
Nothing can quiet the company of none
Nothing can hold back reality once it starts to flood
If you only have yourself and this is who I am
Then i’m a moment from disaster and my moment has passed
How bleak it's all become
Our youth, life, and love
Is this it
Could it really be that living is just the act of losing everything we need
Was this the expectation all along and nobody told me
That as you live and as you love
You do so only to lose
That being alive only takes one but that living takes two
That in the absence of our shelter i can finally see the truth
From the departed dear or otherwise
The cold is coming as sure as the sun will rise
And your receding warmth
Is all that I desire
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